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“My ex has a lot of issues so I really want to get married so my daughter has a new mom.” 12.
“When guys marry single moms and their daughters grow into teenagers, I don’t know how they can control themselves.” 11.
I went out with a girlfriend in Montclair, NJ, to a fun place called Just Jakes. It was a little deceiving, sure, but I thought telling the guys I was a single mom would influence their answers—and I wanted raw thoughts.
It was lovely being out sans Jack, having a cold beer at the bar, surrounded by other adults enjoying drinks, conversation, and music. I videotaped their answers, transcribed what they said, and here’s what I got: “My mom was a single mom most of my childhood, so I have tons of respect for single mothers.
If she prefers not to go out when her kids are home, or doesn’t like to hire a babysitter on school nights, she’ll tell you. If you’re out and she is paying for a sitter it is really nice if you get the check. Which you may be – but if you ask too fast, she will know.
Men and women seem to cope differently with the collapse of a relationship.The dating part seemed relatively easy -- if there was a spark, you went out again -- but the relationship part was a different story entirely.When I found myself in the midst of a divorce and navigating a new dating world -- this time as a single mother -- it dawned on me that any experience garnered in my former incarnation as a single woman had to be thrown out the window.In my experience, men are often more skilled (or at least faster) at getting back in the game.I was not in any shape to go out and meet a new love interest, nor was anyone seeking my company (dour divorcee is hardly on the top of anyone's list of desired dates).
But there are some things that you just do not say to a single mom on a first date, assuming you’re angling for a second. “That’s great your mom lives in town so you can leave your kids with her on weekends.” 2.